To shave or Not to shave, that is the question. David shaves himself each morning, but recently I've noticed large patches on his face that he's missing, and he also seems stressed after shaving. This weekend I suggested he take a break from shaving for awhile and let his facial hair grow and keep his face warm. He loved the idea, and luckily I avoided telling him he wasn't doing a good job.
We have an electric razor, and perhaps I could shave for him, but honestly..... I don't want to. Right now he looks very scruffy. I may think differently about me shaving for him as his hair grows out and if he continues to look too scruffy. For now it will be a day by day or week by week test of endurance on my part.
When he retired from work in 2003, he didn't shave for a couple of weeks. This was his first time to go without shaving, but after a couple of weeks....... he shaved.
The picture below is shortly after he retired and no Alzheimer diagnosis yet, but my antenna was up. Our daughter is his faithful, loving stylist.
2003
2005 - The year David was diagnosed.
And I say, "thank you God for choices to make life less stressful."
10 comments:
Hey Dolores! just stopped by to say hi and see how you two are doing. Your daughter is gorgeous. Is that her little girl? What a cutie! My hubby has had a mustache as long as our kids can remember. Beards are very popular at this time of year for extra warmth.
Toodles, Debbie
One of my favorite memories~~caregivers following precious men through the halls of Memory Care with electric razors in hand!
I believe beards are quite handsome and I love men with little or no hair on their heads !!!
Do what feels best for Mr. David and all will be well.
Thank-you for this journal of your life as you and your beloved husband travel the maze of Alzheimer's together.
Delores, there are things that we women just aren't too comfortable tackling and I think that shaving our husbands is one of them. Elbert got to the point of not doing a good job shaving and I was scared he'd cut himself badly so I tried to do it. 'It ain't fun' (grin) When he moved to Magnolia Manor and they started shaving him I was thrilled.
He looks great with a little facial hair. Maybe you can get onto some sort of routine of only having to do it a couple times a month - or do barber shops still do the shave? But perhaps that would be too stressful as a new experience. All these things to navigate. Sending you prayers and positive energy.
Karla
I remember facing many decisions like this with my mom as time went on. It often bothered me that her hair didn't look the way I know she would want it to look or her clothes were a little messier than she ever would have worn them in her healthier days. It took a while for me to come to terms with the fact that she really didn't know the difference anymore and I was fighting a losing battle to try to have her look perfectly groomed all the time.
Your daughter is such a pretty girl.
Dolores, what a pretty daughter and a cutie-pie grand!
My husband and I are dealing with these issues now, too, with his mom. Happy at Home hit the nail on the head, too. My MIL would not like the way she looks now. We had to quit putting color on her hair and quit making her change clothes so she'd match to go to church with us. We just do the best we can each day and know that people understand. It's tough. Just one day at a time. She doesn't know the difference anymore either. We just do what we can to keep her happy and content - whatever it takes not to upset her.
Your husband looks very happy that his little girl is giving him haircuts and a shave!
Just going with the flow is hard. "endurance" is a good word to describe it.
hugs, judi
I can see that God is giving you wisdom and grace when dealing with your situtation. Looking at the photos of your husband with the beard, he looked pretty good!
Gosh, I just love those pictures mom! I'm so honored that dad still allows me to trim his hair. I certainly wouldn't mind giving him a shave when I do his hair next...
Dad is so handsome - even if he's fuzzy faced :-)
Love you a ton!
Karen
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