I thought our Thanksgiving day with family went well. It wasn't like I would have wanted, but you do what you should do.
I only took a few pictures. I was wishing afterward that I'd taken more.
David stood with us as we held hands and thanked God for our many blessings. He ate in his music room with his music. I thought this would be more comfortable for him, and it was.
I have a table in his music room; he eats there everyday. I tried to keep a semblance of normalcy for him.
His music and his room is now his life ..... I'm thankful for that.
Later in the afternoon, our daughter ....Karen.... gave him a much needed haircut. I see love, when I look at this picture.
We've moved further down the road of moving forward with Alzheimer's.
He's losing more than I'd like to admit. He doesn't know anyone's names, but recognizes faces.
Our house is totally foreign to him; he doesn't know how to get from one place to another.
Last Thanksgiving and Christmas he was included in 'whatever' we did, but that is a thing of the past.
We've lived for 6 years with the knowledge that he has Alzheimer's. In spite of this disease we've made memories and had good times, and for that I am so thankful......God is good!
We've lived for 6 years with the knowledge that he has Alzheimer's. In spite of this disease we've made memories and had good times, and for that I am so thankful......God is good!
25 comments:
Your spirit and attitude is SUCH an inspiration! Your picture of your daughter cutting David's hair brought back memories of me cutting my FIL's hair. I think each day will bring something new. I keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Your FAMILY is beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XO, Pinky
Yes, I remember these phases so well. (Nan loved holding court and having family visit her in her room, but she no longer wished to be in the center of it all.) The good thing is that David may rise up out of it before slipping again. What a sweet photo of your daughter taking care of her dad. Isn't it funny how a small space of one's own becomes such comfort...like a little cocoon? That's what David's music room must be like for him.
I know it is hard on your family...you are so fortunate to have each other...
The love and care and patience that you are able to express; even in the midst of your heartache is an inspiration. It speaks of your faith in God and love and devotion that you have for David. I am praying for you dear friend as you walk through this difficult journey.
Love and blessings,
Vikki
Hi Dolores - Sorry I've been out of pocket lately...
I'm sorry to hear that David is slipping, but glad to know that Thanksgiving came and was enjoyed by all, even if in a different way. Love the way your daughter shows her love for her daddy.
Yes, I understand DAvid's need to stay in his own room - he knows that room, it feels safe. My MIL did that, and still does, only now it's her bed. She's slipping more and more, and altho she doesn't know our names either, I still see some recognition in her eyes. She doesn't talk much. Her physical health is failing, too, and she's forgetting to swallow. We're back to pureed food now...
BUT, God IS good! Yes, He is, and He will see us through! You have a lovely family and I am lifting you and DAvid up this evening!
Oh honey, despite all the sadness with David slipping and all, you all look so happy and blessed to have each other and what a beautiful family you have, those precious grands are so adorable and your big boys so handsome. Your daughter is gorgeous, inside and out, a loving daughter with her dad and David looks so serene and so trustful...she looks just like mama Liz! (Taylor, I mean) Lots of love to you all from FABBY.
What a lovely attitude - to make memories and good times - and notice them!
Dolores:
Damn. Damn, damn, damn.
I hate this part. All I can be happy about is that he has a place that makes him happy. He's still recognizing faces (heck, I have a hard time with names). You accommodate him so well and give him his dignity. You're an angel.
Make all the memories you can. I'm glad your daughter was there to share the day with you.
You're my hero, my sister from another mother!
love,
barbara
What a beautiful family. I am so happy that you have them surrounding you. Sorry it is getting harder and harder...you are an amazing woman. Truly an inspiration to others!
I totally agree with Barbara. You are an angel Dolores and David is so blessed to have you watching over him and making him as comfortable as possible. I can only imagine how difficult it must be getting for you. My grandmother is at the same place where names have escaped her. I think she realizes we are related but I don't want to ask her who she thinks I am because I don't want to hear her answer and I don't want to upset her. This is such a horrible disease (as they all are). I pray that there is a cure in the very near future. You are doing a fabulous job.
Hugs,
Karla
... in spite of the winding/twisting and overwhelming labyrinth of a road you travel .. your vehicle remains on course, steady and strong.
Dolores, I am so sorry to read about David, but as always I admire your attitude and courage. God Bless you both. Hugs...Lu
Oh the children are beautiful Delores...and Karen is such a sweetheart!
Hope your Thanksgiving was warm and loving!
(((HUG)))
I continue to check in on your posts and keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
What a nice get together. Every day at home is precious. how are you doing?
I came by a couple of evening ago, but Blogger wouldn't let me leave a comment on your blog or a few others, so I gave up. I guess it was a glitch because things are OK now.
I think that picture of David and your daughter is priceless.
I'm sorry about the latest changes in David's condition. I remember how difficult it was to watch my Dad's personality slowly fade away. He had been a salesman and politician and it seemed so strange to watch him become so introverted. My Dad didn't live with me, so I got a break. You're experiencing it 24/7 and that must be so difficult. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
What a nice family you and David have.
We had a thanksgiving that my husband could relate to, but he is only three years into Alzheimer's. I learn from you to treasure every day.
We took a trip out of town, after Thanksgiving, to attend a memorial service for a dear friend who died of MD the Saturday after Thanksgiving. I did get to talk with her on Friday. I told of this in the eulogy I delivered. She had her funeral all planned out--incredible friend.
Sometimes we forget that suffering and death comes from other diseases, finances, and psychological illnesses. We are all in this business of caring for one another and bearing one another's burdens.
Sandy, my dear friend who died last Saturday, has been praying for our Alzheimer's journey every day from her wheel chair. Now I told her husband and adult children that it is my turn to pray for them in their grief. I am also remembering you and David in my prayers.
Hugs,
Carol
I love seeing the family pictures and knowing you had so many people, so much family, to share these times with you & David. Knowing also they are your towers of emotional strength in this storm of Alzheimers. I hope you are able to fill this special holiday season with as much family togetherness & love as possible, for you all.
Thank-you again for giving me a glimpse of life as lived with a beloved husband who has lost his memories of you, but is married to a wife who keeps his memories and loves him in actions as well as words.Thank-you for sharing your hard and very difficult days.
I think of you and David every day and often pray for you two. I walk with you in my mind, having gone down the path before you. And, I remember how it was when Elbert was forgetting names and not being able to get from one room to another and being so comfortable in his own little space. You have exhibited such love, such strength, such will. You are such an inspiration to everyone. Give David a hug from me. He's a very special man.
Hi Dolores. Loved the photos. I'm sorry that your Thanksgiving wasn't the way it used to be, but glad to see that, as usual, you are finding ways to make the best of it.
Happy holidays, dear friend.
Gilda
I, too, see love in the photo of Karen and David. In fact, I see love in all of your photos. The twists and turns down the road of Alzheimer's are so challenging and emotional and though love can't cure the disease, it sure helps ease the journey.
I am sorry to hear that David has moved forward. I know that has to be so hard for you, Dolores. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugs,
Kim
Hi darling, I'm glad you had a nice Thanksgiving. David getting a hair cut is just too sweet, I adore the pictures of all the kids. Mr. P is not to that stage "yet". He certainly does not like a lot of company, noise bothers him to no end. Even though my daughter and children spent the night and was verily quiet, he was so glad to see them leave the next morning. It breaks my heart he used to love company and lots of it, he could work a room like no ones business. He's so frail right now, he's legs are getting weaker and weaker and falls a lot, thank goodness I'm still able to get him up, the back and hips talk to me afterwards. This disease is just so mean.. I hate it.I've scaled back on the Christmas decor, that even seems to bother him. Mr. P gets down more than he did before discouraged he's not here as much as he was...it's going to be a very "long" winter... hugs ~lynne~
Oh Dolores, I feel for you but I am glad you have a way of making it feel normal to David. That is a gift and I know you and your family are all thankful for that. You also have a very loving and supportive family. Your grandkids are all so beautiful. I hope it gets better as another holiday approaches....Christine
Keep making those memories, dont give up. You have a lovely home and loving family. Love from the family and the lord will help keep you strong. Its good that you had family around you and all those smiles.
Your grand daughter, Has she danced in the Nutcracker this year yet? I remember you mentioning she will dance again.
GOD keep you strong in your faith.
My hubby's father is not doing well. He doesn't know who Steve is but talks about us to us...if that makes sense. I mean...he know who we are...just NOT WHO WE ARE. We are both thankful for that.
My father's dementia is unlike any I've ever known. He will know me...then not know me...but not at all like Steve's dad. He's lost big chunks of memory where my dad thinks (for the most part) he's still living his life of years gone by. He still thinks he pastors...and us kids are little...but how that reconciles with him when he sees me aging is beyond my scope of understand.
So...know what I do? Just what you are doing. Pressing on...while trusting.
Love you girl~ Been missing you~
xoRebecca
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