With permission from my friend Carol, I'm posting some informative information from her blog that really hit home to me. Check out her blog at Plant City Lady at: http://plantcityladyandfriends.blogspot.com/
Symptoms of Caregiver Stress include denial, anger, social withdrawal, anxiety, depression, exhaustion, sleeplessness, irritability, lack of concentration and health problems.
Thankfully, I don't have the health problems, but the other symptoms sure fit......It makes me tired reading these symptoms, but it also makes me realize why I look so tired.
Ways to Reduce Caregiver Stress from Alzheimer's Association
- Know what resources are available in your community.
- Become educated about Alzheimer's disease and care givingtechniques.
- Get help from family, friends, and community resources.
- Manage your own level of stress. I say simplify, organize.
- Accept changes as they occur.
- Engage in legal and financial planning.
- Be realistic about what you can do.
- Give yourself credit for what you have accomplished; don't feel guilty if you lose patience or can't do everything on your own.
Finally Alzheimer's Association writes to us caregivers: "You can live a meaningful and productive life by taking care of your physical and emotional health, by engaging in activities you enjoy, and by spending time with family and friends." For me, I find this easy to say, but more difficult to do on a daily basis.
Dogs and loved ones with memory issues live in the moment. They enjoy each moment and don't worry about the future or the past. A great lesson for each of us.
And I say, "thank you God for my blessings!"
20 comments:
Good morning dear Dolores ....
I must confess to having had each and every one of the caregiver burnout symptoms ....
Your post is timely and such an important reminder about what controls you actually DO have during the long journey.
Enjoy Labor Day ... Hello to David!
So important what you chose to post. You are always so positive, but it does take a toll. Your friends know more how to pray for yu now.
Thanks for referencing my blog.
Love and prayers from your blogging buddy,
Carol
I have been thinking about you so much these last few weeks and worrying about this very subject. I had wondered if you take any time for yourself. You have a wonderful attitude but I know how much that costs. Please feel free to email me and keep in touch, when you especially need it...reach out. I know you have a wonderful support group but asking is always difficult. Please, ask away! We all love you!!! :)
You always make me smile while reading your blog. I think you have the biggest heart in the world. Isn't God Wonderful? As my mother used to say, "God will take care of you and your loved ones". He has given you lots of Love and Strength.
I love that photo! The four of you look like something out of an early '60's sitcom! :)
You're absolutely right in your list of symptoms of caregiver stress and how to deal with them. For over five years, Peter and I attended a monthly support group run by the Alzheimer Society, and this was by far the most common theme in our discussions. Just do what you can do, Dolores, and don't be too hard on yourself. You should be very proud of what you have accomplished in keeping him home and safe for as long as you have.
Love,
Gilda
Sending strength and courage to you my friend...so wish I could do more to help...just remember there are lots of prayers for you and David!!!
Delores:
If I had to choose one word to describe you, the word would be "faithful".
You are so faithful to God, your beloved husband, your children, your grandchildren, your friends and cyberfriends.
Your faithfulness in living out your marriage vows, day by day, is inspiring, but I would be remiss if I didn't confess that I would like for you to have a regular time for YOU each week.
No-one begrudges a young Mom her Mom's Morning Out once or twice a week, because everyone recognizes that caring for little people is all consuming.
And so it is with caring for a loved one.
I hope I have not spoken out of turn, but instead, out of love. For though I have never met you or your daughter and her family, through the wonder of the internet, I have come to "meet" and care for many people.
And you are at the top of the list. :) Take care, sweet friend and know that you are, as all have said, a dear, sweet, wonderful person, with many prayers surrounding you.
Is avoiding everyone in your family over the weekend considered Caregiver stress? It's really hard for me to work all week, do everything for them all week and then spend the weekend with them too! I holed up and I'm sure they're mad, but I had to run away!!
dolores, bless your heart. my dad was my mom's caregiver and i saw several of these symptoms in him.
with God....all things are possible. Praise the Lord for the promise of the Holy Spirit who is our Helper! i don't see how anyone can do it without Him.
Dolores, my prayers again for you and for David. You are right about the "living in the moment", and so many times I have wished I could really do that. So in some ways, your David is blessed with a gift so many of us are not. And he is blessed with you, the wife who loves him and makes it safe for him to "live in the moment".
I hope you really do take time for yourself, to re-energize and refresh yourself and soul.
Sending you prayers and positive energy Dolores. You are a wonderful caregiver and being stressed is certainly a natural reaction. Hopefully you can make some time for you every now and then (I know how hard that is!).
Hugs,
Karla
Delores,
Oh, my sweet friend. How you have touched my heart this morning. I have so needed an example of faith and trust and you have given me that today.
I have not been writing much lately. Personal illness and several deaths in our family has taken its toll. My heart just had no words to say. But you, dear, dear Friend, have so encouraged me today.
I know God is with you and is using you to touch the lives of those who read your lovely and heartfelt words. I have read the last four posts and have been wiping tears from my eyes as I read of your loyalty, your love, and your faithfulness to your beloved. How wonderful to be as loved as your dear David is.
May the Lord richly bless you, my friend, with all the abundance your life can hold. His love is never ending, His faithfulness ever near, His help so readily available. May He bring all of this to you and your sweet David today.
In Grace,
Marie
The closest I have come to being a caregiver was taking care of my parents...NOTHING like what You're doing, SO, I don't know my behind from a hole in the wall when trying to send you helpful words!
ALL I can do is tell you, my prayers will Not be empty of love for you....Sending you, strength....(((HUG)))
Dolores,
it really helped me quite a bit to read this~ I have been beating myself up lately wondering if I had done everything I could to ensure that Grandma was cared for properly..that her last years were good ones~ so this was a real blessings too me. Please remember just the way you have encouraged me to take care of myself to also make sure that you take care of yourself~ I continue to pray for both you and David.
Much love and blessings,
Vikki
Thanks for the info. This post is my world. You are a blessing and so is Plant City Girl.
What a beautiful family picture. You all look so lovely, Dolores. You are always doing such a good job in caring. You are a remarkable person and in spite of the stress at times, I know you can go on because love prevails....Christine
Hello Dolores - I, too, worry about you, friend, with all your love and care for David - it's all good, but you will crash and burn if you don't take care of yourself. I'm sending up prayers that you'll relax and take one day at a time and live in the moment. Have time for just you and take advantage of those days when you have a sitter to come - maybe even twice or three times a week. We all love you out here in blogland, and nearly all of us know what you're going through and can relate in some way. May the Lord bless you and David as only He can. For He is able to do exceedingly and abundantly more than all we can ask or imagine.
(((hugs)))
Vickie
Dear Delores:
Just stopped buy the blog to 'see' you again and tell you (because I forgot to the other day), how lovely you are in this photo.
I love your hair and the dress? Pretty sure that style is back again. You must have loved being a young wife and mom, because kiddo? You SHINE.
That's all. I think. (shrugs) I may be back. You never can tell. HAHA
Hi Sweetie, wow!! You sure said that right... I too have looked so stressed, I think I'm finally on an even place right now. I'm trying not to be super woman to all and remember there is a me. That is so hard to do at times..I think of you daily and your walk with this illness that's ever present. many many hugs ~lynne~
My grandma has alzheimers/dementia. It is such a sad disease. My aunt has moved my grandma into her home (even though my grandma swears she doesn't need help.) Her memory fails her and her imagination has taken over. Most stories that we hear have never happened and she has forgotten our names, and how we are related, but we still have some enjoyable moments with her. i became a stay at home mom a few months ago and so I try to volunteer a few hours each week to give my aunt some rest and personal time. Although, I am sure it is not enough.
Bless you and your family.
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